Green Tunes: Episode 3

I'll admit it. I have a penchant for novelty songs. Anything weird, quirky, humorous, or just plain goofy usually has a spot in a playlist of mine somewhere. I first taught myself to play the guitar by practicing a simplified version of "I Like Chinese" by the Monty Python troupe about 500 times.

Presidents of the United States of America is a group that is quite good at churning out songs that usually fit at least two of those adjectives I listed above in any given song. The thing I love about this group is that most of the time, they're talking literally. If they write a song about Peaches or a Kitty or the planet Jupiter, they're not using those objects as metaphors for something else. The best thing is, these guys just keep getting better after they sunk back underground after their mid '90s jump to stardom. One of their songs that I play to Nick that he really likes is the closing track on their 2004 album, Love Everybody, called Jennifer's Jacket. This particular performance goes up to 11 because they play the riff from Spinal Tap's Big Bottom at the end.

And she's got safety pins and string holding it together
She can only wear her jacket in warm weather
Although the sleeves need to be shortened
The fact that the arms are falling off isn't important

(Because) Jennifer's jacket, Jennifer's jacket, Jennifer's jacket,
Is falling apart
Jennifer's jacket, Jennifer's jacket, Jennifer's jacket,
Is falling apart

The lining in her coat is rotten
And it seems that the zipper has been completely forgotten
She had a dollar ten for a slice in the pocket of the right
But the pocket had a hole and she looked for the change all night

Jennifer's jacket, Jennifer's jacket, Jennifer's jacket,
Is falling apart
Jennifer's jacket, Jennifer's jacket, Jennifer's jacket,
Is falling apart

This is a list of malformations
But it would cost one hundred dollars for alterations
We all know that the pressed leather is in
But you can't keep warm in the winter in December in the city when it's 32 degrees below zero
with a safety pin!

Jennifer's jacket, Jennifer's jacket, Jennifer's jacket,
Is falling apart
Jennifer's jacket, Jennifer's jacket, Jennifer's jacket,
Is falling apart
Jennifer's jacket, Jennifer's jacket, Jennifer's jacket,
Is falling apart
Jennifer's jacket, Jennifer's jacket, Jennifer's jacket,
Falling apart at the seams!
Falling apart at the seams!
Falling apart at the seams!
Falling apart at the seams! (Jennifer's jacket is)
Falling apart at the seams! (Jennifer's jacket is)
Falling apart at the seams! (Jennifer's jacket is)
Falling apart at the seams! (Jennifer's jacket is)
Falling apart at the seams, yeah!

Five Things

1. What were you doing ten years ago?
I had just finished undergraduate school and was getting ready to move to Pittsburgh. I may have just finished house sitting for a friend's family while they were in Europe and I was looking for a job. Just before I moved, I found one doing telemarketing calls for Time Life. I quit after a week.

2.Name five things on today's "to do" list:
a. finish my presentation
b. help Amy with planting the new flowers
c. spend some time at the neighbor's barbecue
d. change poopy diapers
e. enjoy my deck, some relative silence, and the beautiful weather while I relax on the intertubes.

3.Things I'd do if I was a Billionaire: I'd make sure Amy and I were set for retirement, set up funds for Nick, and make sure my parents were ok. Then I'd be a philanthropist.

4.Three Bad Habits: eating too much, procrastinating, general laziness

5.Five places I've lived: Slippery Rock, PA, Pittsburgh, PA, McDonald, PA, Chicago, IL, Morton Grove, IL.

6.Five jobs I've had: Composer/Sound Designer, Church Music Director, Cable Modem Installer, Music wholesale shipping department gorilla, dishwasher

7..Five People I'm Tagging:
JuJu, V, W, oKo, and that's all I got. :)

No Good Deed

As most of you know, I'm on the last leg of my leave from work under the FMLA (Family Medical Leave Act). Under the act, I am entitled to 12 weeks of leave from my job but it's up to my employers to decide how to pay or not pay me as they see fit. As it stands, I have had to use all of my paid time off for the rest of year which was officially exhausted as of the first week of June. I have been on unpaid leave since then.

To my dismay, I noticed yesterday that my time off for this coming Friday, July 4th, was also unpaid. I asked about the entry in case of an error. The reply was that they did not have to pay me because I am on special leave under the FMLA. The confusing part for me is that they did pay me for Memorial Day and I was on leave then, too. The only difference seems to be that I still had paid vacation time left. But they won't pay me for the fourth even though it's a company paid holiday and everyone in the building will be getting paid for not being there. Except for me, of course. No good deed goes unpunished. I am guilty of wanting to spend time caring for my infant son during the second three months of his life, therefore in addition to the previous month that they already did not have to pay my salary, they're adding the one day holiday.

I'm sure that it's legal otherwise they wouldn't be doing it. But this wasn't explained to me when I met with HR about it. Twice. It just makes me sad to think that my own company would rape me for every penny that they possibly could if they had the opportunity. As a side note, this is the same company that had a total income of one-hundred twelve million dollars in 2007 with a total operating expense of nineteen million. Most of us have seen tiny raises in the past three years, bonuses that are OK but nothing to write home about, and trouble getting our requests heard to upgrade our audio workstation computers from MacOS 9.2 for the past two years.

Stage Fright: Epilogue

A recent comment on my Stage Fright entry got me thinking a bit more about how I was presenting Mr. Galper and I thought I'd add some reflections on the story from a decade out.

In the end, I think perhaps it was a matter of ego. Galper struck me as a man who thought very highly of himself. Sometimes, when you get that mix of ego and braggadocio, it's easy to want to push people further who may not have your inherent skills for the sake of their own improvement. After all, it ain't bragging when you can back it up, right? Buddy Rich did it, too. Was what Buddy said on those bus tapes true? Probably. But did being a jerk about it help the situation? Probably not. I'm not condoning anyone's behavior. I can only speak for myself. That kind of pressure only makes me want to stop, not to push myself further. Others may find that encouraging. I do not.

Was Hal trying to intimidate me? I'll never know. He may have thought that he was doing the jazz world and me a favor Simon Cowell-style by taking some wind out of my sails. He also may have thought nothing of it, though, which is probably much more likely. It's just not his style. My style of learning and his style of teaching (at least in that context) were entirely different.