Trust me, I'd find a way. But I've finally had it. Again. I've never been a skinny person or athletic in any sense of the word, but in the past 10 years, my weight has yo-yo'd from about 215 pounds, about my size when I left high school, all the way to my recent all-time fatass record of 261 set last Sunday. I've dieted and exercised sporadically as my weight has fluctuated, losing 30 pounds in 2002, gaining it all back plus some in 2003 as I was jobless and depressed most of that year, then once I found a job in 2004 remaining fat and happy until 2006 when I tried the South Beach diet (and exercise), losing 25 pounds and then again putting it all back on plus some in 2007 and '08 when Amy became pregnant and had a pretty rough go of it. Then, with the new job in 2008 stressing me out on a daily basis, I've become addicted to junk food, rewarding myself for getting through a bad day or just eating because I had a good day and I felt happy. Everything became a reason to eat. It got to the point where I was hiding food because I was ashamed of my eating habits. That is just wrong. Plain wrong. No, wait, plain wrong is probably good for you. This is probably Twinkie-covered-in-chocolate-and-deep-fried wrong.
I am, here and now, putting my foot down publicly. No more. When I saw my weight above 260 last weekend, I realized that my problem is manageable with the right mindset and tools. I started off doing some easy aerobic exercise on a daily basis, about 30 minutes a day, EVERY day. Nothing too strenuous but just something to get me off my giant ass. Knowing that that is not enough, I've also decided to start keeping a record of my exercise progress and caloric intake at MyFitnessPal.com. If anyone that reads this would like to join in with me, for your sake or mine (dieting alone sucks major balls not to mention the inevitable denial of my brains pleasure and reward centers), please look me up there and friend me. My username is DrRosenRosen. I will see you in a year and hopefully will have lost a good portion of the 60 pounds that I need to lose. I know I can do this. My biggest hurdles will be the psychological, emotional and behavioral issues I have with food. A lifetime of learning poor eating habits is a hard thing to break.
2 comments:
Lots of best wishes sent your way!! You are SO not alone in these struggles and it's great you're honest with them! Yet still I have the excess poundage to break away from and can relate entirely. You'd think training for black belt would give enough reason to break the addictions- but the excuses hold so strong. Good luck in your endeavors!!! You can do it!
I will join you. I weigh more than Evan now. :( Not good. Not good.
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