Eulogy of an In-Law

We traveled to western Pennsylvania again this past weekend for the funeral of Amy's grandmother, Eleanor (nicknamed Jackie). It was a simple service that spoke volumes about the kind of woman she was. She lived almost all of her 87 years in a farm house on a tiny road directly across from the church that she attended. Her last few years were plagued by an encroaching dementia that eventually overtook her, but I had the opportunity to know her before the disease took her mind completely and I came to know her girlish giggle and acutely pleasant disposition. The family had also brought a number of old photographs to the viewings and although it was never apparent during the days that I knew her, the photographs revealed aspects of Jackie the tomboy in her early days, confidently posing for candids in her softball uniform, arms akimbo, firm square jaw, and a huge smile.

I first visited Jackie with Amy thirteen years ago and at that time there were few other houses nearby and the house on the corner of the nearest intersection doubled as a small grocery store in true form for rural living. These days, there are more houses around, modern constructions that reflect modern times, the store has long since closed and converted to being simply a home, but despite these changes the simple, agricultural roots of the area's past inhabitants continue to echo strongly. In many ways, those echoes of the past along with current residents create a singularly picturesque representation of rural living as long as one avoids any perenially prickly subjects of conversation.

This was the first time I had met many of the extended branches of the Beck/Bell/Weaver side of Amy's family tree. I will never pretend to possess the ability to unravel that tangled lineage, but it was good to finally be able to put some of the easier pieces into place. I had the opportunity to meet Jackie's sister Katie. Katie is 90 years old, the oldest and only surviving member of that group of siblings. I had always heard stories from Amy about visits to Katie's house but was never able to meet her due to her own declining health so I was thankful to finally put a face with the name. In many ways, most notably her benignly peevish attitude and that signature giggle, it was obvious that Katie and Jackie were sisters.

Jackie lived her life long and well. She will be missed by her family, including this in-law, and despite the pangs of sorrow, I think that every one of us can agree that she is better off without the pain and confusion of her final days. We are thankful that her more painful illnesses did not have a chance to drag her through her final days any longer than necessary. I am thankful that I had the opportunity to know her.